Irene’s Blog-Blog

to Nakata san’s constant request for me to reconsider staying…and there’s no reason why not, because he was willing to comply to 3 of my conditions…and today he did not let me down. Today he brought me along for our first store visit together…and taught me a few things I didn’t know about retail, and perishable stuff…It was a warm feeling, like the feeling when I was with my first boss, like he’s my papa. He’s also taking me to JB later this month, a place I thought I won’t go back to again, since Kodama san brought me there a while ago. Although I told him he didnt need to bring me, but he insisted…Sweet!

Now I no longer feel that I’m being shared, because he’s officially making me his PA, and fighting for me. He said if the other boss doesn’t want a PA, then he doesn’t get one, but he’s gonna block him from using me…Wow…I was quite taken back actually…After our little talk, he straightaway went to MD office to settle the matter…and took it to HR…I can’t wait till the next T&R comes out…and that I’m going to be Mr. Nakata’s PA…now I’ve already self-declared to suppliers and customers alike that I’m his PA…haha…Kulit muka tebal ne! hehe!

Today someone told me my boss is 2nd highest ranking in the company after our ED goes back to Japan…it’s kinda worrying wut will become of me, if he does get promoted. Does it mean I’ll stay with him still? Or do I still stay back in Merchandising? *_* I dun really wanna think about it. Anyway my friend is still quite keen on me joining the Singaporean retailer. She said after she leaves, will be keeping in touch with me, so maybe in 1 or 2 more years, I can change environment again..but this time, instead of traveling round West Malaysia, I will be going overseas instead…^^

But I only know one thing. When the tarot card told me I’d be traveling a lot in future, I never expected it to come true…esp after I accepted another job already…but life is indeed unpredictable…and I’m happy with the decision I’ve made. She also told me once I break up, there will be a lot of guys interested in me…which is I guess kinda true…haha…Been getting  a lot of compliments from colleagues and others alike since I cut my hair…>_<  But my ultimate wish is that I find that someone soon to share my happiness and sadness with..

Last nite was two of my colleagues’ wedding reception. One Japanese and one Malaysian from Kuching. What a lovely couple! Makes me envy! Heh. But that’s not the reason why I feel sad. For some reason, I just do.

During the daytime, my boss, Nakata san asked me when was my last day. And so I told him, and he started to frown and asked me to stay. Then during the wedding reception, he approached me again and asked me to stay in front of other Japanese colleagues. Why Why Why Why!!! Then after that, the big group of Japanese and some of their wives adjourned to Nikko Hotel for some after drinks, me inclusive. Again he told me that he won’t let me leave. It’s so sweet that he wanted me to stay so much.

One of my managers also asked me again to consider carefully whether I really want to let go the chance to work for a Singaporean retailer…

I’m so torn. I really like Nakata san and I do get worried the new PA is not gonna help him much, as he’s still new and he does need someone experienced. I do consider staying back..I really do. And I also would love to work for a Singaporean retailer because I don’t think teaching is my cup of tea anymore…Maybe I have to disappoint my new employer in the end…oh I don’t know…Why is this happening to me?

I’m kinda lost right now. My manager who’s joining a Singapore retailer has asked me to join her, and she will be the one interviewing me, so I guess it’ll be very easy for me to get the job! And she specifically told me that the retailer does not source locally, so there will be lots of overseas travel! I love working in the retailing industry but due to some commitment I have now, I can’t just join like that. Should I disappoint my friend and grab this opportunity or should I just not care? Anyway I’ll most likely take on this job offer, probably at a later date…cos she’ll keep me posted whenever there is new job opening available…cool bananas/potatoes!!!

I had my first car accident today…Not my fault of course…This car rammed into mine…What bad luck!! I’m still very much traumatised…

Today it’s a weird and sad day for me..Only this morning my cousin mentioned to me, ‘Hey, your little bunny seems to be very weak…I’m afraid she’ll die…" That got me thinking almost the whole day today (when I had time to slow down from my work a bit to let my mind wander about a little), ‘Hmm..I think she’s going to die soon..It’s just a matter of time…’ Even when I was driving back home today from work, I kept thinking the same thing…As I approached my apartment and was about to turn the lock to open the grill, my cousin opened the door from inside…Hmm..tat’s weird, I thought to myself. She can’t be that excited about me returning home so late, well, I was supposed to cook dinner..but since I came home way after her…and she’d never ever greeted me at the door, it was very surprising for me. And the first thing she uttered to me was..your little rabbit has passed away………….And I got in and saw the cage with her lifeless body lying on one side at the cage corner………….I had to confirm…so I asked her…are you sure she’s not sleeping? I observed and saw no movements at all………..I didn’t know how I feel at that point in time…I thought perhaps it was better after all, since she’d always been sick and weak…but then seeing her dead carcass lying there, I couldn’t help but feel something eating away at my heart…It was later at the disposal of the body, that I really cried out, cos I knew then I’d lost Bun Bun forever………..and I recalled the moments spent with her, and how much I’d neglected her and stuff…It’s always like this…you only cherish something when it’s gone…and I guess I never quite learnt my lesson..Right now, I’m still not feeling any better…It’s 10 plus now and I’ve yet to remove my make-up, take my shower and stuff…I think I’ll do that now and go to bed…It’s been really tiring…Somehow it was a case of deja-vu when I felt like this last I lost someone to another world………but of course a rabbit I’ve had for nearly 2 months can’t compare to a human being…still it hurts………I hope I’ll regain my composure tomorrow…Goodnite Bun Bun……….forever………

I’m making an early ‘retirement’ from the education line, making a transition into the corporate world. I’ll be starting my new job as a Personal Assistant (PA) to a Japanese boss in a Japanese company on 7th September. As of yet, I have not met my boss..I hope he’s nice! Glad that my Japanese degree has not gone to waste, even though initially it seemed like it!! Still wondering why they employed me though I have no prior experience..Well, I shall not be nosey and dwell on it. Should just relish the prospect of working in that big company for now. I don’t even wanna think about how I’m gonna cope after the starting date…But must think positive…hmm…After all, I made it through though other shortlisted candidates seemed quite perfect for the job (with more experience than me too, I suspect!!). Thank you God. Amen.

Love Love Love Love…hmmm I wonder why my nick is ‘loveluv’? 

Love…

The snow beats down upon my window,
As it calls out my name incessantly,
To adorn and behold its beauty,
Which will cease when the season is over,

Out on the snowy white field,
Like a pool sprawled of pure white daisies,
I draw on it of our love so deep,
With drops of dark red blood,
Representing my devotion for thee,
Which means more than mere red roses,
With a notion of love, but superficiality…

Did you ever have dreams when you were a child? Well, never mind if you’re still a child………

Dreams…

Heavenly stars so bright,
I reached to touch the light,
The glitter seeps through my palm,
I stirred in the night so calm,
As I saw the fairies playing,
In the brightness so alluring,
The beauty that beholds my eyes,
Like a tree unfolding its leaves,
The dream of a distant memory,
As it reveals its magnificent glory,
I stirred again in my sleep,
And heard the sound of weep,
As the stars and fairies bid me adieu,
I looked up and exclaimed ‘Mon Dieu!’,
Then I woke up reluctantly crying,
As the sunshine came pouring,
Through my glass window pane,
That brought me back my sane,
As I face another day of reality,
The typical child life in a bustling city…

I love flowers…who doesn’t? Beautiful scent, colourful petals too…But flowers can portray a dark side…as exeplified in my next poem…

Flowers

White and pure they lay in my hands,
A puff of gentle wind they lay still,
Still as the breath in my throat,

Blue and pretty they lay on my palms,
A shower of rain they lay still,
Still as the tears in my eyes,

Red and tender they lay on my hair,
A brush of my hands they lay still,
Still as the blood on my lips,

Black and deadly they lay on my face,
The closing of my eyes they lay still,
Still as the arrival of night.

What comes to mind when the word ‘ghost’ is mentioned? Well, this is a little sum up of what I think….

Wandering Souls

no warmth from the bright sun
nor feel the passion of love anymore,
She sees only streams of dark moving clouds
amongst those inhaling in living air,
who are those, only wandering souls
is there room for pity,
in that heart of yours?
no shell to contain her soul
nor shelter from stormy nights,
where is she to dwell
please do tell her where,
She’s so lost in the crowd
of frustrated and confused souls,
her anger heats and boils up
but that takes her nowhere,
in the chilliness of night time
She sees a sea of people,
whilst you see only your following shadow
you do not hear her and the rest,
as they sulk and curse of their rotten fate
your destiny is an envy to all,
you still have warm breaths
and pink rosy cheeks to match,
as you look forward to the future
to fulfill your awaiting destiny,
but what is she and the rest,
only wandering souls and nothing more.